Tuesday, November 12, 2013

Interesting Follow-up on BAM two years later

Last week I was asked to talk to a 17 year old that was disrespecting his mother by ignoring her and talking back at her... What was interesting is that the Mom had been through BAM two years earlier and had improved the relationship with the son up until recently. When I quizzed about the key issue it was over a report that was supposed to be turned in and because the teenager had not followed through the mother was furious. It really was interesting in that it fell into a specific criteria in BAM focused on allowing the son to make mistakes and forcing him to take responsibility for his actions. The Mom was very upset because it could have an affect on his entire future in college. Very legitimate concern; however, if the son does not take responsibility now...how many young men drop out of college? How many young men fail to keep a job? How many young men fail to follow through in a marriage? It is extremely difficult to watch young people make mistakes but we can not live their lives for them if they are ever going to grow and decide for themselves that THEY WANT to succeed. Failure is often what it takes to help motivate that young boy to become a man.

Book Censorship

As an author of over 15 books on Amazon - book Censorship always gets my attention when it is in the press. The answer the public library offers is to ask your children what they are reading...the person making that recommendation must either be naive or not have children :) since when do our children tell us about the bad things they are reading or watching online? I have instituted a "Parents Page" with my books that informs parents of subject matter so they can determine if they want the child to read the book. I have been censored from one church because a 18 year old in the story is dreaming of a girl in a bikini on a white beach...their religion believes bikinis are of the devil so they banned it...that should be their right and I respect that. That is the same reason the yellow banner serves as a warning that my books are Pro-Jesus; to be fair to the parents that do not want their children to read books with Christians seen in a positive light. Authors should take the responsibility to have a information page specifically for parents describing their view point on content if they want parents to trust what the child is reading. I wonder what many parents would have done if they understood The Hunger Games from a view point page.

Tuesday, November 5, 2013

Recent Gun Violence by Young Men

We are seeing more and more violence by young men which the media focus moves to guns and drugs...both are symptoms not the root of the problem. When young men feel hopeless it starts a process of depression which is what we are really dealing with. This is labeled a disease and if you study how thoughts in the brain trigger chemicals in our bodies it does become a disease. Treating it with more chemicals seems to be the medical worlds answer...what about taking the time to work with the young men in helping their thinking process?

Tuesday, October 29, 2013

Mom's breakthrough

Our BAM program this Sunday had a "Mom Breakthrough" - The hardest and honestly - scariest - part of BAM is trying to help Moms let go for the health of their son. I've seen real anger and even bordering hate from Moms as the program gets to the point of asking them to stop mothering their teenage son so he can grow past the Mommas Boy level of maturity. In this last program, a mother came forward to admit she had gone through all these emotions but the DVD had convicted her that BAM was guiding her to the next step. She had left her husband in one state to follow he 22 year old son to another state because she believed he still needed her. After watching the DVD she made a public commitment in front of a dozen peers to go back to her husband and had met with her son that day to tell him she was letting him go. There was real pain and loss in her eyes as she stated that he was her only child and it was incredibly hard to make the decision - but because she loved her son so much - she was willing to let him go.

Monday, October 7, 2013

Boy's and Mom Help

BAM has been rather quiet since we lost our monthly sponsor at the Nampa Christian Book store (went out of business); however, recently I have been asked to do several more programs. So we will be changing a few things to help this ministry. 1. BAM will have a new board of directors from multi-denominational volunteers 2. A new focus will be on sponsoring the new programs in non-denominational environments such as rented halls, the idea is to make sure denominational lines are not inhibiting a mother from getting help in dealing with her teenage son. 3. Better explanation that the Bible based part is looking at how Jesus guided and directed men such as John, Peter and Paul on a man to man level. The Blog will have several moms that have raised sons contributing every month. Feel free to ask questions and get involved...remember, BAM is not about right and wrong ways to raise a son but focused on finding tools that communicate better with your teenage son.

Friday, May 31, 2013

Boys and Guns

This weekend I watched two 10 year old boys camping that had both BB guns and Airsoft pistols and shotguns...I tried to be discreet but I wanted to witness their behavior and attitude. Surprisingly they showed a great amount of respect with the "toy" weapons. Careful where they aimed the guns even when they were not shooting. Never saw them do anything dangerous with them. The reality was that experience was very good for them (scary for mom) but if they are going to be around guns it is so important they learn to respect them...your thoughts on this is welcome.

Thursday, January 17, 2013

02/09/2013 Next BAM class

02-09-13 Church sponsored BAM class coming up. If you would like to attend contact me at ted@christianactionadventures.com