Tuesday, November 12, 2013
Last week I was asked to talk to a 17 year old that was disrespecting his mother by ignoring her and talking back at her... What was interesting is that the Mom had been through BAM two years earlier and had improved the relationship with the son up until recently. When I quizzed about the key issue it was over a report that was supposed to be turned in and because the teenager had not followed through the mother was furious. It really was interesting in that it fell into a specific criteria in BAM focused on allowing the son to make mistakes and forcing him to take responsibility for his actions. The Mom was very upset because it could have an affect on his entire future in college. Very legitimate concern; however, if the son does not take responsibility now...how many young men drop out of college? How many young men fail to keep a job? How many young men fail to follow through in a marriage? It is extremely difficult to watch young people make mistakes but we can not live their lives for them if they are ever going to grow and decide for themselves that THEY WANT to succeed. Failure is often what it takes to help motivate that young boy to become a man.
Tuesday, November 5, 2013
Tuesday, October 29, 2013
Our BAM program this Sunday had a "Mom Breakthrough" - The hardest and honestly - scariest - part of BAM is trying to help Moms let go for the health of their son. I've seen real anger and even bordering hate from Moms as the program gets to the point of asking them to stop mothering their teenage son so he can grow past the Mommas Boy level of maturity. In this last program, a mother came forward to admit she had gone through all these emotions but the DVD had convicted her that BAM was guiding her to the next step. She had left her husband in one state to follow he 22 year old son to another state because she believed he still needed her. After watching the DVD she made a public commitment in front of a dozen peers to go back to her husband and had met with her son that day to tell him she was letting him go. There was real pain and loss in her eyes as she stated that he was her only child and it was incredibly hard to make the decision - but because she loved her son so much - she was willing to let him go.
Monday, October 7, 2013
Friday, May 31, 2013
This weekend I watched two 10 year old boys camping that had both BB guns and Airsoft pistols and shotguns...I tried to be discreet but I wanted to witness their behavior and attitude. Surprisingly they showed a great amount of respect with the "toy" weapons. Careful where they aimed the guns even when they were not shooting. Never saw them do anything dangerous with them. The reality was that experience was very good for them (scary for mom) but if they are going to be around guns it is so important they learn to respect them...your thoughts on this is welcome.